Tangible Schizophrenia


Dear John VI: The Singing Heart

Author: Guede Mazaka
Rating: PG
Pairing: Gen. Hartigan and Nancy.
Feedback: Good lines, bad ones, and why you liked/disliked them.
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Notes: Title and quote from here.
Summary: The first bloom of puppy love.


ďPeople with song mouths connecting with song hearts; people who must sing or die.Ē
--Work Gangs, Carl Sandburg

* * *

Dear Hartigan,

I think Iím in love.

Itís incredible. I canít even think about it, canít even think about his name without getting so giddy that I have to sit down. Then I remember that I already am sitting down and my face goes so hot. My mother keeps asking if Iím sick, so I told her Iíve got a little cold because Iím definitely not going to tell her the truth.

I canít concentrate on anything. I have some major tests next week, and Iím supposing to be practicing for my driving exam, but Iím just terrified that Iíll drive right onto the sidewalk without noticing because Iíll be thinking of him.

And the best partóheís thinking of me! Me! He is so amazingly sweet. I thought I knew boys, but he just turns every prediction upside-down. When I first walked (tiptoed, actually) up to him and fumbled asking him to help me with an essay, he turned red and stammered. Him, one of the most popular guys in school. But he isnít anything like those snotty other boys that only want to look down your shirt and maybe talk you into the back of their car. The first time we kissed, I had to make the first move, and he was so nervous that he accidentally bit me. I barely felt it, but he spent the next five minutes apologizing and even after we finally kissed without anything going wrong, he still looked so sorry that I had to tickle him. Did I mention that heís desperately ticklish on his right side?

God, I must sound like an idiot. But Iím so happy. I have a report due in two days that I havenít even picked out a topic for, let alone done any research, and all I can think is that the color of his eyes is the same as the color of dark chocolate, my favorite sweet. That yesterday he stared down some jerks who were terrifying a guy just because he wears glasses and is smaller than them and smarter, too. That he thinks itís great we can discuss Shakespeare (weíre studying Romeo and Juliet in English, and I keep wanting to scribble lines from it all over my books). Iím terrified that everything will go wrong, but at the same time I canít stop smiling. I really canít. My face is starting to hurt, and that only makes me giggle like a nut.

I love him.

Wish you were here so you could meet him,